Tinder mistakes on a college campus are experience unto itself. There’s nothing like the flirty banter, the exchange of numbers and social media handles and, of course, the indescribable experience that is the actual date. You quickly realize that no amount of snapchatting has prepared you for the awkwardness of actually meeting up in person. And no amount of late night texting can make it any less awkward when you spot them on campus after a, uh, chill sesh.
Whether you swipe right to hookups or something serious, here are Tinder Mistakes you definitely want to avoid.
1. Don’t Lie About Your Entire Identity
Creating a fake persona when you have an online relationship is easy. I mean after all, the other person knows absolutely nothing about you. Who are they to call you out when you say you’re like, the biggest fan of hockey ever? But a little comment about last night’s game can turn into weeks of looking up ESPN Sports highlights, hoping he doesn’t lose interest or catch on to the fact that you probably know about as much about sports as he does about Kylie Jenner Lipkits. And the actual date? Well, it’s not like these things hold up in person. What started out as a casual meetup at a barbeque restaurant turned into three hours of mansplaining how the game actually worked. I wouldn’t wish that on anyone.
2. Don’t Send Insults
You would think this one wouldn’t have to be said, right? Try to avoid this pitfall by asking yourself a few simple questions before you send a message:
1: Do I sound like I’m talking down to my match?
2: Does what I’m saying sound like something Donald Trump would say?
3: And finally, why is the first thing to come out of my mouth insulting AF? Who ignored me as a child?
I once spent about an hour of my life trying to explain to a STEM major the merits of the humanities via Tinder. Why did I feel the need to defend myself to a guy I just met? These are the questions that may or may not keep me up at night. What started out as me defending my major turned into one of the most heated arguments of my life. But hey, maybe that was his goal. Angry, frustrated sex can be great, right? Too bad he never got it.
3. Don’t Ask for Things Without Consent
Whether it’s asking for unsolicited threesomes or sending unwanted pics, if the other person isn’t into it, it’s not okay. There has never been a time when a girl has actually opened up her Snapchat after a long day and been like, “Hey, I really hope that this guy I’m talking to sent me some sexy photos.” Chances are, if we’ve never expressed interest in it before, we don’t want to be surprised by it now. Consent is important, people! Don’t make this amateur Tinder mistake.
4. Don’t Mention Children… Or Marriage… Or Pregnancy
Every college student wants to hear about your plans to get them pregnant right before you try and sleep with them, right? Wrong. Take note, people. In the above Tinder mistake, the second red flag occurs when they mention that a Nanny (#freeraquel, anyone?) would be stuck caring for those kids. Now’s it’s definitely time to unmatch. If you don’t, you could end up like me: a poor naïve soul who kept chatting until the guy called an Uber to my dorm at 5 p.m. Same thing goes for marriage. What are the odds you’ll actually find your Tinderella? No one wants to hear about any plans for proposal after the second or third message. Would you go up to a perfect stranger and get down on one knee? We didn’t think so.
5. Don’t Wait (Literal) Months to Respond
You may think that there’s nothing people love more than a good chase. But on Tinder, as in many alternate universes, different rules apply. If it’s been a few weeks, and I’ve already swiped through a few dozen profiles and you still haven’t answered, chances are I’ve lost interest. If you have something interesting to say, say it. If all you want to do is play a game of 20 questions that you found on Total Frat Move, keep it to yourself and avoid this Tinder mistake. In this case, not saying anything might be better. Trust me.
6. Don’t Talk Only in Pictures
Sometimes pictures aren’t always worth 1,000 words. Though this Tinder mistake was comforting for a bit to be sent a funny meme every night before I fell asleep, after a while, it just got old. Waking up to 32 (yes, you read that right, 32) screenshots isn’t for everybody. Oh, and as a side note: calling someone your “meme queen” will probably make them uncomfortable.