Ah, College— a time to enjoy a little freedom especially in the dating world. Most college students find themselves hitting the dating apps, going to parties and experiencing the best and worst of “hookup culture.” You must use good judgment and remember to take the proper precautions for your safety on your journey to find the perfect match…or at least the perfect hookup. Browse through our list of 10 relatable hookup stories to prepare you for your experiences and to let you know that we’ve all been there.
Read on for first-hand experiences and some insider tips to stay safe and enjoy swiping.
1. When your Tinder date takes you to their parent’s house
“I met up with a guy from Tinder and his idea of a first date was to go back to his parents’ place and watch a movie. I was a very naïve freshman in college, so no alarms rang off. I thought this is what everyone was doing. So, we got to his place, we go straight into his room and he puts on the movie ‘Grease.’ Not 10 minutes go by before he tries something. I felt really awkward because his parents were around, so I just pretended Grease was my all-time favorite movie,” Florida International University senior Jacky Cornejo said.
That makes one way to get out of a bad situation! Nothing feels worse than trying to hook-up with someone while their parents hover around. To avoid loitering parents during a hookup, make solid plans with your date beforehand and figure out a spot beforehand. Another good tip involves telling a friend where you plan on spending the night—You could even share your location with them in case you need a quick escape or if you run into some trouble.
Also, never feel pressured to go through with anything you intended on doing. Let your date know you don’t feel comfortable with the situation and always make an exit plan. Likewise, if you meet with someone who doesn’t appear comfortable with the situation, learn to read the signs and work with them to better the vibes. Alternatives can arise with just some simple communication from the other person. I mean real talk here–don’t underestimate the value of a plain old cuddle sesh! Sometimes jumping into the sack just isn’t in the stars… especially with parents around.
2. When you’re trying to study, and your roommate brings someone over
“It was my first time living away for college and I was determined to do my best. I was planning on staying up very late to finish several assignments for one of my summer courses my roommate approaches me for a favor. He asked if I could give him the room for a couple hours to hopefully hookup with a girl he just met. He was a nice guy and I consider myself pretty easy going so I agreed. I left to go to the common room and worked on several assignments that night and ended up pulling an all-nighter. On one hand, I got to finish everything and didn’t have to walk in on anything awkwardly, on the other I was visibly and physically exhausted and regretted it because I had class that morning. I came back to find him and the girl asleep on his bed. He later told me nothing happened that night, they just kissed a bit, so it was all for nothing,” a senior at Florida Atlantic University said.
While some use college to find themselves, go to parties and hookup with as many people as they can, others go to college simply to study and pass their classes. When a test approaches the next day, what could be worse than your roommate bringing someone over for a Netflix and Chill session?
Setting boundaries with your roommates from the start holds such importance, especially when it involves bringing people over. Developing a solid relationship with them starts with communication and respect. If you share a room with someone mind the importance of giving them some space sometimes. Find a good study/hangout spot outside of your dorm to avoid driving each other insane.
3. Hooking up with the same guy as your friend
“Sometimes when we like someone new, we can become blind and forget the people who are really important. If you end up sleeping with someone and they slept with your friend, they probably aren’t looking for anything serious anyway and they’re just going to hurt you. You’re better off laughing it off and looking for someone else rather than ending a friendship over it,” a senior at Florida International University said.
Sometimes we experience things that make us take a step back and realize what a small world we really live in. The smaller the campus, the smaller the dating pool, so the hookup scene can get really crowded. You’d end up surprised to see how often this happens, and depending on the situation, you can either find it really funny or break people’s hearts. If you find yourself in the latter half of the situation remember that a sexual/romantic interest shouldn’t get between you and your friend. If you ever find yourself in this situation, consider taking the high road. After all, there are plenty of fish in the sea! But if you feel like this situation revealed an insensitive nature in your friend, it may be time to cut them off as well and take some time to focus on yourself.
4. When your date smells like old ramen
“I usually carry gum and perfume in my purse so if I’m hooking up with someone and I don’t want to offend them I usually offer them gum or spray my perfume on myself… those guys usually don’t get a call back though so if you’re looking to bring someone back to your place you should definitely clean up!” a junior at the University of Central Florida said.
Nothing feels worse than getting in the mood, only to realize that your partner’s breath stinks, or they don’t keep a tidy room. Unfortunately, many students struggle to keep a tidy room in college because of their first experience away from home where their parents did the lion’s share of the housework. So, what do you do if the smell takes you out of the mood? What’s that saying? Cleanliness is close to a good time? Ah, close enough.
Follow this tip to keep your bachelor/bachelorette pad clean: set a time of the week for each chore, so that you can avoid the stress of days where you must to do everything at the same time. For example, reserve Saturdays for laundry and Sundays for cleaning the bathroom. Give yourself fifteen minutes a day to organize your room. This will help avoid collecting a giant mess at the end of the week.
5. Being too nervous to actually go through with it
“I was hooking up with a tinder date in my room and I suddenly got nervous, so I pulled it to a screeching halt. To pass the time, I ended up making her watch me play Super Mario World. She was super chill like ‘oh don’t worry about it,’” a senior at Florida International University said.
Sometimes we bite off a little more than we can chew in the DM’s. If you find yourself as all talk and no action, no worries. A good date will respect your wishes and try to make a good time out of just hanging out. With this, make sure you receive full consent from the person you might hook up with before trying anything and let them know that you find it perfectly fine to just hang out if they feel uncomfortable. Sometimes the signs will not seem readily available, and your date might start to feel pressured to do more than willing. Don’t shy away from expressing your feelings of unease. Sometimes it even helps relax you when you air out your worries.
6. When your hookup starts stalking you on social media after
“I hooked-up with a guy one time and afterwards he followed all my guy friends on Instagram and DM’d them to stay away from me. It really freaked me out,” a senior at the University of Central Florida said.
Unfortunately, the dating scene comes with some real weirdos with unprocessed emotional issues, and this can end up affecting you. Worst case scenario, you may find that after hooking up with someone they start to text you too much, like all of your pictures, follow those close to you and even start showing up at your job. Yikes! Reminder: stalking is illegal.
Most campuses provide resources for you if you experience discomfort with the way someone goes about interacting with you. If you start to notice signs of cyberstalking, try talking to them first and telling them that you feel uncomfortable with their behavior. If they don’t stop, you should go find support on campus immediately before it gets out of hand.
7. STI Freakout
“I was planning to meet a guy from Tinder and had a pretty successful hookup until I had lunch with one of my friends and discovered that she had also slept with him. So, she and I talked and hung out and it was all good and kind of funny but then a few weeks later she messaged me saying someone SHE KNEW who ALSO hooked up with him got something that resembled an STI. I immediately got tested and talked to the guy about it, but he became very defensive which made me upset. At the end of it all, I didn’t contract an STI, thank God! But the guy and I never spoke again,” a senior at Florida State University said.
Uh-oh. Thinking you might have an STI seems all too real. This scary occurrence happens all too often with people who don’t go about hooking up carefully. Talking to your prospective partner about STI’s should serve as a more mainstream habit, although it might lead to awkwardness and seem offensive to some. The guy in this scenario became offended and defensive when confronted about the possibility that he potentially passed an STI to a sexual partner–this shouldn’t happen. Despite this, your health should fall as your number one priority so make sure you take time to vet the people you choose to hook-up with and use proper protection that way you can enjoy a shock-free morning.
8. When your hookup shows you the ropes
“I got to college and I’d never been with anyone and I also wasn’t meeting anyone I liked in person, so I got on a dating app and matched with someone I thought was cool. I honestly didn’t expect to be hooking up with him so quickly, but the date went really well, and I said, ‘Ah whatever let’s do it!’ My date was way more experienced, but he was really nice about it and showed me the ropes. We didn’t go all the way, but once I got over the initial shock of it all I was able to have a good time and felt free to experience more in the future,” a senior at the University of Florida said.
Lots of students enter college with very little to no experience in hooking up, dating or anything for that matter. However, there’s nothing wrong with that! We all experience things in our own time when and when we feel ready. A lot of us have experienced our first times with a hookup rather than a significant other, and that could cause a little awkwardness…but everyone’s first time awkward anyway. Remember, don’t feel the need to rush into anything sexual because all your friends do it and you feel left out. That can put you in some unwanted situations that you did not actually intend for. If you do feel ready, make sure you establish trust with the person you end up with, and listen to your gut!
9. Hooking up in unlikely places
“I lived off-campus freshman year and my parents didn’t want me dating so I couldn’t bring anyone over to the house. The guy I was seeing at the time was in a similar situation, but we really wanted a comfortable spot to be alone together so one of our friends let us use his grandparents’ house while they were away. Not my proudest moment,” Senior at Florida State University said
We all hear those crazy stories about people hooking up in the strangest places. College kids are horny AF and sometimes ready to throw down wherever. While we highly recommend finding a safe space that you call your own to engage in sexual activity, we realize that sometimes that isn’t an option for everyone. Just in case you don’t have great friends that rent out their grandparent’s house for an afternoon delight, be informed that it is illegal to have sex in public places, even in your own car. With that in mind, maybe you’ll think twice the next time you’re looking for a quickie and other times you got to do what you got to do, right?
10. Falling for someone you were “just hooking up with”
“I was hooking up with this girl who was just getting over another relationship and I caught mad feelings for her, but she wouldn’t give me a chance to be anything more than a hookup. I eventually had to end it because she was breaking my heart, but I still liked her a lot. It made me not want to put my trust in anyone for a while and I ended up doing the same thing to another girl shortly after,” Graduate from South Florida University said.
Last but not least—the age-old story: Two people hook up multiple times and somebody always catches feelings while the other did not long for anything serious. Hookup culture can end up being a really unfortunate place to get caught up in for those hopeless romantics just looking to find true love. If you fall under the category of someone who wears their heart on their sleeve, get ready to feel the pain. This justifies why honest communication holds so much importance, but hookup culture fills up with deceitful people.
If you want something serious you could consider joining a club on campus or asking one of your friends to set you up instead. Entering a hookup scenario in the hopes that it may turn into a relationship almost always ends up disastrous. Likewise, if you don’t want a relationship, let the person know and don’t play with their emotions. Everyone fears getting their heartbroken, but remember to engage in mindfulness towards the other person’s feelings… but all’s fair in love and war, right?