Summer Lovin’, Can it Last?

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By Alexis Gutter>Junior>Journalism>University of Maryland
Summer flings are an annual tradition afflicted on many a single person looking for some companionship for those summer nights (uh well-a uh well-a well-a huh).  Whether the influx in passion is due to rising temperatures, rising hemlines or lack of classes, what happens when late August rolls around and you’re not ready to put out the fire? 



For self-proclaimed summer romance pro, Fordham University senior, Dave Yusavitz took three summers with his hometown fling to decide that their situation should be given the chance to travel beyond the convenience of the academic off-season.
Convenience, Yusavitz said, is the biggest reason that summer flings solidify themselves, and their school-year inconvenience is why many fail.“If I didn’t like her and she didn’t like me, then it wouldn’t have worked once school started because we wouldn’t have gotten anything out [of] it,” Yusavitz said.

However, noting that it took three summers for Yusavitz’s feelings of legitimacy towards his fling to manifest, it’s important to understand what happens when feelings stay short-term and fleeting.            
Psychotherapist author of Money, Sex and Kids: Stop Fighting about the Three Things That Can Ruin Your Marriage, Tina B. Tessina, said while fun, flings can be unhealthy and emotionally dangerous because if one half may feel that the physical component means commitment and the other feels differently, someone’s going to end up hurt and the relationship will ultimately crumble. “On the other hand, if you can have a fling and just be left with nostalgia (and no STD’s), it could make a lovely memory,” Tessina said.

For Boston University junior Audrey Chomsky, her summer fling began under the stars at camp and was the perfect end to her long days as a counselor. But that very first night, she told her beau that when the summer ended, so would they. “I decided to go to college away from home so that nothing would hold me back,” Chomsky said. “Even though I was crazy about him, I didn’t want him to get in the way of that. But I imagine summer romances that are meant to last are more powerful than my determination to end them.”

Even though Chomsky’s fling didn’t traverse seasons, she still regards it as happy ending, calling it both special and meaningful.

Outside of maintaining low maintenance expectations, Tessina advised keeping standard relationship protocol. “The most important aspect of summer dating, in addition to having a good time, is to get to know each other better,” Tessina said. 

Yusavitz agreed that summer flings are like miniature relationships and the obligation to keep things casual could be why his took so long to become official. “Throughout the years, we kept in touch, but this summer, I decided something could become of it,” Yusavitz said. “We talked about it a little and realized that we really enjoyed our time together, so we decided to try out a long distance relationship during the year. “

Yusavitz said that keeping things realistic and maintaining good communication is crucial for a smooth summer fling to-fall romance transformation. 

So, if this summer you happen to meet a girl crazy for you or a boy cute as can be, once the summer days start drifting away, don’t necessarily throw in the [beach] towel. Examine your relationship and decide with your partner if your fling can maintain the heat once the temperature cools.




College Magazine Staff

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