Congratulations, you’ve got your ticket to a special one-night-only show. No it’s not a concert, or a screening of the latest hipster film out at the local dive movie theater. It’s a one-night stand born out of the expert combination of poor lighting, a few too many dollar-cocktails and a playlist of Top 20 pop hits. Here are a few of the thoughts that come to mind when that initial high wears off and you realize that once was definitely enough.
1. “Where the hell am I? Oh, right…”
![giphy.com](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/giphy-67.gif)
2. “Yep, at least half of my clothing is tucked between the limbs of the strange man I shared a twin bed with last night.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/awkward1.gif)
3. “Alright, my bra strap is literally wrapped around his arm. Time to pull out those bomb-diffusing tricks I learned from binge-watching MacGyver on Netflix.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/macgyver.gif)
4. “How is he not awake right now? These pre-Cold War bed springs are loud enough to rouse Stalin himself from the grave.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/loudnoises.gif)
5. “Isn’t there supposed to be an afterglow? All I see is the harsh morning light, and it’s not doing this guy any favors.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/lights.gif)
6. “Help! My phone is on its last dying breaths – I must promptly abort this mission.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/phone1.gif)
7. “Should I leave a thank you note, or my number? Maybe just a Facebook friend request… That way he can see my picture, and I don’t have to attempt to find a pen in this dump.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/thankyou.gif)
8. “Well, I’ve just sealed my position in the fiery pits of hell for skipping out like this. He is probably a very nice man with a very nice family, and I just ditched him like a pair of white capris after Labor Day.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/bye.gif)
9. “Don’t look back, don’t look back. Okay, look back once. Nope, still not as cute as I remember. My conscience is clear.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/dontgoback.gif)
10. “So this is what campus looks like before 8 a.m.? I would have never known. I think tomorrow is the day I start changing my ways. First order of business is to take a brisk walk.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/christraeger.gif)
11. “Don’t you judge me, morning joggers. If you’re sober enough to run at this hour, your life is clearly not as exciting as mine. I’m never getting up this early again.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/getaroom.gif)
12. “Everyone knows what I’m up to right now. If the look of shame in my eyes isn’t a dead giveaway, then the amount of Forever 21 I’m rocking before sunset definitely is.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/girls.gif)
13. “I should have just taken one for the team and stuck around long enough to see if I could squeeze a free breakfast out of him.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/freefood.gif)
14. “Gosh, I’m starving. Is the dining hall even open right now? I shouldn’t even have to wonder about these things. I’m like some kind of peasant. Yet another reason to keep sleeping in.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/food.gif)
15. “I just want a shower, my bed and a steaming plate of chocolate chip pancakes, in that order. No actually, all at once. I want it all at once. I deserve it for surviving this harrowing journey.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/waffles.gif)
16. “What if he is one of those gentlemen that takes ladies off campus for date night? I could use one of those, and I’m sure his looks would grow on me if he did. ”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/romance.gif)
17. “Who am I kidding? He didn’t get any of my jokes and his room smelled like hamsters. I’m allowed to have some standards.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/mindy.gif)
18. “My self-confidence is at peak. I don’t care if I look and smell like a discarded mannequin left out in a dumpster overnight, I feel fierce.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/happywalk.gif)
19. “I think that I can do this whole casual hook-up thing. I need to start making plans for tonight.”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/walkofshame.gif)
20. “Never mind, I can’t risk seeing that guy again. Should I transfer?”
![](https://www.collegemagazine.com/wp-content/uploads/2015/06/jimhiding.gif)