Should You Be In A Relationship In College?

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By Alexis Rodriguez > Cornell University > Junior > English
The one thing (of many) that all of our lectures and discussion sections never cover are the matters of the heart. Oh cupid where art thou amongst the throng of beer loving frat boys and parties that only end in drunken hook-ups ? In a world of prelims, papers, and extracurricular activities it is extremely difficult to navigate the even more complicated world of relationships. Do you even want one at this point in your life? If you do, how do you even go about finding someone on the same page as you?

If you do, how do you even go about finding someone on the same page as you? If you’re in one, how do you maintain it?
 The bottom line to remember despite what point you are at in the throes of passion (or lack thereof) is that we are all still exceptionally young; there is a whole world that lies ahead. Then again, this is an important piece of knowledge to remember when you’re blinded by the arrows of Eros (rolls off the tongue doesn’t it?). My father gave me the best advice the last time I was at home. As college students there are either two types of people (in general) who we can get involved with. The first type being a guy or girl not currently on the same academic level as we are. Maybe they never went to school or maybe they’re already out in the job market turning their degree into a career.  The problem with this is that it is of utmost importance for your relationship to be on the same wavelength. It’s extremely difficult for someone not in your position to understand what it’s like (i.e. someone who never went to college) and it is equally difficult for a person working a 9 to 5 in the biz to get what’s so cool about still going to frat parties. On the other hand we have type two: you are both in school (hopefully at the same school) and you are both equally ambitious in terms of academics and figuring out your lives post-degree. While at first this seems like a great deal (someone who FINALLY gets what you’re going through) you have to look at it in perspective. At this point in our respective academic careers we are competing for the ultimate goal: getting a job. We are all vying for that great GPA, the perfect resume, and who knows what city we’ll end up in. The reality is that while for a time your relationship will be great, there will almost always be that tension that comes with two people full of ambition.
SO what are you supposed to do? How are you supposed to maintain a relationship successfully, or if you’re not in one and want one, how do you achieve it? I wish I really did have all the answers, but then I guess life wouldn’t be as interesting. In my opinion, the best thing you can do while in college is build a strong foundation of friends. It really is true that friends can get you through anything. Even when your heart is shattered into a million pieces they’ll be there with a pint of Ben and Jerry’s or some drinks and video games. The key is putting everything into perspective. Our lives will change drastically on the other side of academia. If you’re intent on finding that someone, put yourself out there (in the most respectful of ways!) Get involved in groups, interact with different social circles, and always be honest. IF you start casually seeing someone and you both want different things – no bueno. Unnecessary heart ache. You don’t want to end up being that one-night stand but if you do, hey! To each their own. Go for it. College is all about finding yourself, forming bonds that can last a lifetime, networking, figuring out your life, and who knows, maybe finding the one. Regardless, it is definitely a time to have fun, and never forget that. We are young. Everything happens for a reason. Que sera, sera.

College Magazine Staff

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