Is semen actually good for your hair and teeth?

Dr. Sawyer: Absolutely, and it also raises your IQ by 50 points, makes you fluent in seven languages, automatically protects you against all cancers for the rest of your life, and guarantees you’ll win a gold medal in GULLABILITY.  Are you kidding me?! The initial purveyor (and his fellow distributors) of this “seminal” information had to be a man.  He gets props for the sheer balls of using an outrageous line like that, and who knows, maybe it even worked once.  Why not?  Come on, he’s doing you a favor by providing his semen (free of charge) that can only be extracted from his body through fellatio, he’s actually protecting you from cancer, what a guy!  The short answer to this question is a resounding No!