5 Steps to Take Before Asking Someone Out

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It isn’t news that most college kids have a hard time asking their crushes on dates. I get it. It’s hard. The hookup culture has put us out of practice and now, when we actually like someone enough to go out with them, we have absolutely no idea how to go about posing the big question. So what are your options? Well, you could send repeated subliminal messages and hope the person you like is incredibly receptive. But if you’ve been using all your brainpower and he or she still isn’t getting the message, it might be time for a healthy alternative. So here’s how you build up to asking someone on an official date:  

1. The Study Date: I know, I know, but this really works. If your cutie is in your class you’ve probably already initiated some kind of conversation, even if it’s just commiserating over how boring the class is. If you haven’t done that, well, you need to start somewhere. But from this point, it’s pretty easy to move forward. When the next big exam comes around, suggest you split up the study guide and meet to go over it. That way you’ll get to hang out without the pressure. And you just might pass your class.

2. The Required Lecture: This one isn’t too different from the study date. We’re all in those classes where we have to go to an on campus talk or film viewing. If your guy or girl is in class with you, casually mention that you should go together. It doesn’t make you look forward, just friendly, especially if you’ve already mastered the study date. And close quarters give a lot of room for flirty elbow touching. Subtle, but effective.

3. The Gym Date: If you’re a gym rat your crush might be too. If you see him or her in the gym all the time, grab the treadmill next to them and try to strike up a conversation. That’ll help you work your way up to asking if he or she wants a gym buddy. This isn’t just for the gym though; you can try to get closer if you’re in the same club or activity too. Half the battle is won just by having similar interests.

4. The Pregame or Party: Whoa, now you’re getting daring. This is almost like asking someone on a date, but with a group, which is much less terrifying. Mention that you were invited to a party or pregame that you think will be a lot of fun. You bring your friends, he or she will probably bring their friends, and you get to hang out without all the awkward icebreakers.

5. The Coffee / FroYo Date: You’re so close! If you got them to the party you definitely know they’re interested, so now is the time to strike. Coffee or froyo is an inexpensive version of a date, so even if all doesn’t go well, at least you can say you didn’t go bankrupt on something that wasn’t meant to be. Also, this is a shorter version of a date, so you’ll be less likely to run out of things to talk about. And if it does go well you have a green light for the real deal.

 It’s a brave new world out there people! Don’t fear the date, embrace it. And if it doesn’t work out, oh well, you’ll always have those good old fashioned, non-committal hookups.   


Photos from howtodothings.com

Senior > English and Communications > Boston College

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