The pathway to adulthood can feel rocky sometimes. We face multiple obstacles the moment we step outside our childhood home and into the real world. From learning how to cook to learning how to pay taxes, so many things exist that we must learn, but have never really been taught how to do. And that can lead someone into a bit of a breakdown. Everyone will just tell you to take a breath and calm down, but truly, life doesn’t work like that. At a time when most of us are facing some of the hardest parts of our lives, we just have to remember that sometimes it’s okay to not be okay.
Check out these ten reasons why it’s okay to feel like everything spirals out of control at times, during this crazy college life.
10. College Is Hard
This should come as a no-brainer for anyone. College brings a workload unlike anything we have ever had before. Even so, we still discover so many other things that we worry about when we get our student ID’s those faithful first few days of school. We have to remember to actually feed ourselves, learn how to take care of ourselves and on top of that, somehow find the time to do our work. That, in and of itself, can be stressful to anyone when they have never been confronted with that kind of life before this.
9. Looking for an Internship is Stressful
College also brings the question of the rest of your life into play too. Even so, with that scary question, we forcefully submit applications to companies that don’t know us to somehow convince them that us, as students, can help their business. From searching through the endless emails we get to finally having that cover letter checked over, the whole internship process defines the term ‘stressful.’ The whole ordeal could become even worse when a student applies in a competitive field and not many positions are available. Yikes!
8. Let’s Talk About the Past
Coming to college means a lot of changes, and that includes friends. Those certain people from high school who you thought you’d stay in touch with forever? They suddenly drop off the face of the earth. I know from experience. I had at least twenty friends in my friend group from high school when I went off to college. I now only talk to two of them on a regular basis. When someone stops using communication with people that we truly thought would stick with us, finding a source to vent to proves difficult.
7. Making New Friends Can Be Challenging
Everyone walking on campus becomes a scared freshman on their first day looking for someone to connect with. But keeping those friendships you made during orientation week? That could become one of the most challenging things you face. Sometimes you’ve connected with someone for so long that you almost forget how to make friends. On top of the work, some college students have barely any time for a social group at all. It all depends on how you feel about the whole business of friendships, really.
6. You’re On Your Own. For Real.
Besides the school aspect of college, as well as the friends, everyone is on their own. Back in high school, if you had trouble with anyone, you could just walk back home and complain to your parent. While today’s modern cell phones make it easier to stay in contact with our family, if something happens here, you have to take care of yourself, in every shape or form that comes at you.
If you get sick, if you get hurt, if you get academic integrity violation, if you get suspended—all of that becomes a part of a student’s life and is carried on their shoulders. In the eyes of the university, all of us are adults. Which means you can take care of yourself and must take care of yourself. That, alone, requires a lot of work.
5. Peer Pressure Doesn’t Go Away
I won’t lie, I love to go out and have a good time. But that doesn’t mean everyone does. Plenty of college students would rather stay inside their dorm on a Saturday night and read a good book. Even so, there’s that crowd of residents who will pressure you to drink, or to take that drug or to wear that dress you think might be a little too much or all of the above.
Sometimes, the idea of having a social group takes over your own insecurities, and being forced to do things like this can translate to long friendships and less loneliness. But that can still ruin someone’s day when they are pushed into doing something they don’t want to do. Peer pressure, even in college, can take up a good portion of our sanity. You don’t have to give into it, but sometimes you feel like you must. Sometimes, people just suck.
4. You Don’t Have Any Real Time to Yourself
What’s trending these days? Self-care. I can not stress to you how important taking care of yourself will become once you’re older. The moment I started taking the time out of my day to make myself feel good about myself, I felt like the troubles I had with my insecurities started to decrease. But sometimes in college, sparing the time to take care of your mental health can be extremely difficult.
I already mentioned all the work one student can face in a single week of college. Then, when someone’s done with that, anyone would be too tired to even care about doing anything, including taking the time to take that bath or watching your favorite show. When the objects and events that you love are suddenly ripped from your life because of exhaustion, you will feel mentally drained.
My relationship describes one of the few lucky stories: people who found a boyfriend during their first semester of college. I have stuck to him since the very day I did. But finding someone in college can become so hard. I have so many friends who have trouble just establishing a connection with someone let alone taking a person you like on a date. With all the technology we have in dating, you’d think relationships would overwhelm the planet, but hookups take over the dating culture today, still.
I’m not saying don’t hook up if that happens to be what you want to do. But if someone is looking for a relationship, and a serious one at that, just know that there are people like you out there, too. There are thousands of other people in the same position, scrolling through Tinder, trying to find someone that doesn’t instantly ask for nudes via the messaging portion.
2. Mental Health Is Not Just an Adjective
I’m serious when I say everyone’s overworked in college. With everything that happens, educationally, socially and mentally, it takes a serious toll on you. My freshman year became the worst year of my college experience because I had broken my arm, was doing badly in my classes and barely had any friends. That messed me up big time. I developed serious anxiety and depression that took a long time to overcome.
But what made it better came in the form of support groups, student’s who were like me. People who had gone through the exact same emotions that I had swimming inside of me. And to anyone who feels mentally unhealthy out there, just know that someone understands what you are going through. It sometimes just takes a little longer to reach out and talk to them.
1. Your Life Is Changing. It’s Alright to Be Nervous.
This moment, right now, develops into one of the scariest times of your life. College comes as a main reason, but an underlying truth lingers beneath the surface level; we are becoming adults. Everyone somehow tries to get a job and steps into big city pants to somehow establish themselves in the career that they want. Thinking about that can be a bit nerve-wracking. That feeling? Completely normal.
Everyone should be nervous when that part of life comes to them. But just know that this will pass. All of the stress and late-nighters and cold pizza will pass and soon, you will be living in an apartment working for what you want with the friends you will have for the rest of your life. You will face this world head on and all of the stresses you once faced will hopefully melt away once you walk across that stage and say goodbye to college.
But first, just get through this term paper you probably have due.