Tis the season to want to blow your brains out because it seems like everyone around you is in the lovey-dovey Christmas mode. Is it just me, or do couples get extra gross around the holidays? The cutesy Christmas pictures, crooning “Baby It’s Cold Outside” to each other, etc. Mistletoe is nice when you have someone special to kiss, but not at a frat party where you’re sweaty and that guy who reeks of beer is standing underneath the red and green with a “Come hither” look. And don’t even get me started on New Years.
But did you ever stop to think that maybe all those adorable twosomes are doing it wrong and maybe you’re doing it right? Do single people actually have more fun? Here’s a few reasons why it’s better to be single around the holidays.
You don’t have to buy him or her a gift.
Everyone knows how hard it is to find a gift for that special someone. It’s got to have the right amount of sentimental value, be the right size and cost an appropriate amount. Buy him a watch that’s too big and he feels emasculated. Buy her a box of chocolates and she thinks you’re trying to make her fat. There’s no winning. Good thing you’re not in a relationship and you can spend that extra dough on a little something special for yourself.
No awkward meet the parents moment.
If you’ve been in a relationship for a while the holidays are the opportune time to meet the family of your significant other. You’ve got to go through that nerve-wracking moment of what to wear – Does this show too much cleavage? Am I supposed to wear a tie? – What to bring – If I bring wine will they think I’m an alcoholic? Are carnations acceptable? (No. Never.) – And then bring on the “How did you two meet?” – Um, not sure but he seemed nice when I woke up in his bed the next morning. Singles, congratulate yourselves, you’ve dodged a bullet. Relationship people, maybe consider moving far far away?
You still get to have girls / guys’ nights.
When you’re in a relationship, along with meeting the parents you have to meet the friends of your boo. This genial get-together has the potential to be worse than meeting his or her folks. The girls are all giggling and whispering while the poor boyfriend is left sitting there awkwardly, trying to join the conversation. If you’re a girl meeting his guy friends it’s the, “Yeah mannnnn. You scored yourself a hottie!” But, if you’re blissfully single you can do what you’ve always done with your home friends without the pressure of making sure he or she is entertained.
Better movie nights.
When you’re in a relationship there are certain sacrifices that need to be made – one of the biggest being giving up the remote control. This may not seem like a big deal, but when she wants to watch Borrowed Hearts: A Holiday Romance and he wants to see Bad Santa, there’s trouble. Whoever wins knows that next time it’s their partner’s turn and whatever they choose will undoubtedly be worse than their original pick. If you’re the loser in the remote battle you have to sit through a movie you’d rather gouge your eyes out than see. Lose lose situation. When you’re single, the remote is all yours, and you can feel free to watch 8 Crazy Nights or Love Actually as many times as you please.
You still get to hookup with whoever you want.
This is the big one. You know over Christmas / Hanukkah / New Years you’re going to be invited to at least one crazy party where the only acceptable option is to get sh*t faced. When you’re coupled up you’ve got to tone down your party animal. When you’re single on the other hand, you can feel free to dance on tables, do body shots, and have a little fun not appropriate for under the mistletoe. Yeahhh buddyyyyy.
So this holiday season, don’t let being single bring you down. You’ve actually got a lot more to look forward to.
Photos taken from cool987fm.com, rottentomatoes.com, longevity.about.com, cacha.com and knhk.com