When Your Friends Don’t Like Your Boyfriend

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You think you’ve found the greatest guy ever, and what is the first thing that any normal girl would do about it? Share the juicy details with her friends. You can’t wait to spill about the cute things he says and does, as well as the slightly annoying things that you’ll probably gloss over and pretend like they're nothing. But what if your friends can’t stop harping about how wrong he is for you or why you shouldn’t give him any more chances? Is there anything that can be done to change their minds?

Swaying a person’s opinion about someone else is a near-impossible feat, no matter what good things they hear about. It is important that you can at least understand where your friends are coming from, because being removed from a situation helps to see the relationship for what it really is, good or bad.

Take their advice with a grain of salt. They may have heard untrue rumors or have unrelated beef with him or someone he knows. What your friends are complaining about is really the determining factor of whether you take their advice to heart. If he doesn’t text you back very often or seems a little too busy to spend time with you, talk to him about it.

He doesn’t necessarily have to know that your friends caught on first,  just bring it up as a concern and if he’s a worthwhile guy he’ll understand and try to fix it.Having an open line of communication is important with both your friends and your guy: you don’t want to get mad when your friends give you unsolicited advice, and you want to be able to go to your boyfriend with concerns you may have.

What if your friends have a large concern? That he’s seeing someone else or that you two aren’t on the same page about the nature of your relationship? These are things to take under more consideration when heard from others because they may have reliable sources or have spoken to others who know this guy better than you do. Hear what your friends have to say and go directly to the source: the man in question. If he shows sign of any red flags pointing at the problem, you have your answer. When dealing with friends, it’s all a matter of context.

To remedy the ill feelings your group has about your man, take the time to really show them what things are great about him. If he goes to your school, organize hangouts or interactions where your friends can get to know him without you there to talk him up, and if he’s at home or long-distance keep them in the loop about what successful things he's accomplished at school, or have your friends crash a couple Skype dates once in a while. If he’s the right guy, soon enough your friends will come to realize that and learn to love him as much as you do.

Image: http://www.datingish.com/757861105/your-friends-vs-my-friends/

Sophomore > Journalism and Sociology > Notre Dame

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