The One Night Stand for Dummies

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A one night stand is like that second piece of pie after a big Thanksgiving dinner—it seems like a good idea at first, but once it’s over you feel unsatisfied with the results and stupid for giving in. I can’t guarantee that you’ll feel less sleazy, but I can assure you that following these tips will make your one night stand as worthwhile and memorable as it can be (whether you want to remember it is a different story…).

Body prep. You never know what can happen after a long night of dancing and shots. One thing might lead to another and before you know it, you’re following someone into bed. You don’t want to be that person whose hygiene was lacking. If you know you’re going out that night, just make sure to shave any area that needs to be shaved, shower and PLEASE remember the deodorant.

Dress to impress. If you’re going out with the intention of catching someone’s eye, chances are that you’ll be wearing your best and (possibly) sluttiest outfit—at least on the surface. Make sure to also dress it up underneath with a nice pair of underwear and a sexy bra, so if you wind up in someone’s room for the night they’ll be impressed with you with or without your clothes on.

Drink with a limit. If you wake up next to someone you don’t recognize you know there’s a problem. When you go out, develop a drinking limit so that you can rate the people who approach you. If someone asks you home for the night, you’ll be sober enough to judge the person and decide if it’s a good idea. If you’re too drunk to know the person you’re sleeping with, you’re most likely going to regret it.

Stay at your place. Sometimes the walk of shame can be done gracefully, but more likely than not you’ll be judged. To avoid getting those embarrassing looks of judgment, take your one night stand to your place. Not only will you escape the walk of shame, but you’re also in a familiar and comfortable space. If you need to use the bathroom, get something to eat or drink, or want different clothes, you have everything right there already. Plus you can get off, then kick the other person out.

 So there you have it, the best way to have a one night stand. It may not be the classiest college activity but if you're gonna do it you might as well do it well. Cause let's face it, sometimes you just gotta get it in.   


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Sophomore > Journalism and Environmental Science > NYU

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