The start of new semster not far in the future means new classes, new people and new class crushes. We all have our special reasons (or someones) for going to class, and it isn’t because we are actually interested in hearing what the professor has to say.
So when you walk into your first class in the next couple of weeks and find that special cutie to actually show up to and dress like a human for, here’s how to break the ice (and it doesn’t include any polar bears).
1. “I heard the professor is really hard.”
Ask if they have read the reviews on the professor. Make up a bogus ‘friend of a friend’ who took the class. The more elaborate story, the better.
2. “Are you taking this class for your major/general requirements?”
Whatever their answer, reply with “Oh, me too. What major? Which requirement?”
3. “Did you get the textbook for this class yet?”
There’s a reason for #brokecollegestudent. Your whole budget and barista paycheck and summer savings all somehow end up going to the five textbooks your professor put on the syllabus but won’t actually even lecture from. No matter what their major, all college students minor in complaining.
4. “Is this seat taken?”
This is also an excuse to show up to class a little late. If you’re not ready to jump into introductions, ask if you’ve missed anything yet.
5. “Do you know if he put the syllabus up somewhere?”
Pretend you never heard where the professor actually put it. Even if you’re one of those that have it printed out and hole-punched in a binder for the first day of class, just don’t and ask so they can now tell you what’s on the syllabus.
6. “Are you a –whatever- year?”
Follow their answer up with a, “Oh I just heard that all –whatever- years take this class? I don’t know, I mean I’m a –whatever- year”. That’s usually enough to start off the recycled topics of “How do you like it? What else are you taking? and Do you live in the dorms?”…
7. “Hey, weren’t you in my psych class last semester?”
Make up some characteristic you ‘remember,’ so it sounds less like a line at a frat party. “Yeah, didn’t you always sit at the back of the class?” When they say no, just laugh and let them know they have a twin on campus.
8. “Did you see that game?”
If you don’t actually know of any games, just hope they do. Who knows? You might get lucky (in more ways than one).
9. “Which TA do you have?”
Move the conversation to share about last semester’s TA from hell. Everyone’s had one of those.
10. “Do you know when the activities fair is?”
Ask about any school event – advanced screening, football game, Chinese Student Union dumpling night mixer. You can even pull out your phone and pretend a friend texted you to ask. You might even work an invite into the conversation if it goes well!
Image: Elite Daily