My Lover Is Kind Of A Bum

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It’s hard to talk about your relationship when no one seems to approve of it. You don’t feel embarrassed, you just feel as if you know what other people are thinking. It’s not positive things either. In Samantha’s case, a junior from the University of Houston, it’s not that her boyfriend treats her bad — he actually treats her very well. It’s the fact that everyone thinks she can “do better.” 

She’s the picture perfect student. She’s smart; having a full ride to college and working hard for the grades she makes, she also works full-time at a restaurant so she doesn’t have to ask her parents for money. It’s no wonder when people look at her and then look at her boyfriend, they tell her she can do better.

He’s not a bad person, “but when people compare us together, they tend to wonder why I’m with him.” 

“He’s so sweet to me and is always making me laugh. I can be myself around him and when we go out together, the connection is deep.” But Samantha’s family and friends are constantly dropping hints on how much better she can do. “They tell me that I’m the woman and he’s the man; that he should be spoiling me with gifts and such. I don’t know. None of those things really mattered to me. I mean, it would be nice to get things just because, but I wouldn’t want someone to be with me based on material things. I love who I am around him, why would I throw that away?”

If you’re in a similar situation, you have to understand that your family and friends just want the best for you. They don’t want to see someone, a relative they see as “perfect,” to be settling for someone who isn’t on par with them. You have to really lay out all the pros and cons in your relationship and see if your significant other will benefit you in the long run rather than right now.

“I’m happy and that is all that really matters to me. Right now he doesn’t have a job, but we’re young. He will get there; it’s not like he ISN’T looking for one,” she said.

We all know that relationships aren’t perfect and that happiness is a big part of staying in a relationship. The only person who can decide on your relationship is yourself, not your parents or your friends. If you feel as if the relationship is worth it, go for it. But if you’re starting to feel that what your friends are saying about your lover is true, you might want to look it over once more.

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Junior > Journalism > University of Texas

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