Tonight’s the night. The boy across the hall asked you to meet him by the elevators for your date, your heart is fluttering and you can barely contain your excitement. As you get dressed, you glance at your calendar and notice a big red circle over tomorrow’s date that reads, “Microbiology Test!” You disregard it and go back to dressing up. Makeup is done and you’re out the door, leaving your textbook haphazardly hanging over your hamper.
College is a juggling act. You have classes, clubs, your social life, and an overall need to graduate in four years. But as any cliché college trope can tell you, college is also a time to discover yourself and what it truly means to be in love. Chances are, if you’re open to it, your first serious relationship will happen in college. You’ll blush in front of them, your hands will become clammy and you’ll probably blurt out a sexual innuendo.
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Let’s talk about love. Love is devotion. Love is wearing your heart on your sleeve and not being worried that it might get hurt. Love is a dedication to someone other than yourself and the knowledge that they feel just as dedicated to you. Love is a big deal. It’s an even bigger deal in college because there isn’t just one thing to focus on. You will constantly be switching gears from classes to dates to assuring your friends that you are alive, even though they haven’t seen you in weeks. Unless you have circus training on your resume, you may need to get used to the juggling act before taking on something as huge and monumental as falling in love.
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I cannot say that I have personally had a relationship in college, but I have had the pleasure of falling for someone during my time here. Every day we’d text each other about what we were doing, where we were going or which class had that annoying kid who always asked questions. We spent countless nights just talking about how we should be doing homework, but not actually attempting to do anything related to homework. For about a month, my friends thought I had dropped off the face of the earth. My test grades dropped because of all the time we spent together. I had to realize something: A new love interest became another aspect to add to my endless struggle of juggling school, my job, and a life. After a while, a crack was driven between us and it became harder and harder to tell if we really wanted to know how our days were going or if it was just an item to check off our daily to-do list. Eventually, we had to let go of each other to balance out our busy lives.
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I don’t mean this to sound sad or depressing, or make it a public service announcement about how relationships are detrimental to your college success, because that’s not the case. For all I know, you could meet your future spouse by holding the elevator for someone else. Anything can happen. However, even if you are in your first serious relationship in college, you have to ask yourself if you’re ready for it. I feel that love isn’t something you take lightly, in any situation: college, high school, life; it’s a serious concept to grapple with. But the last thing you want to do is to put someone ahead of yourself. Focus on your grades, focus on graduation, and if you’re absolutely ready for it, focus on love. At that point, you’ve earned it.
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