“So, is this gonna happen?” “Uh huh…do you have any protection?”
If you’re a guy (and especially if you’re a girl) you never want the answer to that question to be no. Not only can that ruin a night of passion, but it could also lead to Rush Limbaugh calling you a slut for asking someone else for baby blockers. Luckily for you, you live on one of our nation’s wonderful college campuses, which are cornucopias of contraceptives. Check out the best places on campus to snag a few extra condoms:
1.) Your Friendly Neighborhood Health Center
Most public schools recognize that college students are having sex. Even better: most of them have come to the conclusion that if it’s happening and they can’t stop it, they might as well do everything in their power to make sure students stay safe. This is why most campus health centers offer free condoms to those who come asking. Asking an adult for contraceptives isn’t ideal, but it’s better than becoming the girl from Sk8er Boi. “Five years from now, she sits at home, feeding the baby, she's all alone…”
2.) Check Your Local Convenience Store
If a school is large enough, chances are it has a few CVS-esque minimarts available for student use. The University of Maryland has three of them, and not only do they all sell condoms, but you never have to spend a real dollar. You pay in Terp Bucks, UMD’s alternative to actual money. Not that safe sex isn’t worth forking over the extra cash, but we’re college students. Unless it’s absolutely necessary, we won’t spend any of our hard-earned moola.
3.) A Valentine’s Day Gift
Go to your campus’s student union on Valentine’s Day. I would be shocked if there isn’t at least one student group giving out condoms in honor of the special day that leads to a lot of special nights (or in the rare case, afternoon delights). Or, better yet, just open the door to your dorm room. If you have an RA as cool as mine, he or she will have taped a condom and a heart-shaped lollipop on your door to make sure your Valentine’s Day doesn’t result in any regrets.
4.) Can You Help a Brother/Sister Out?
If you’re a freshman or sophomore, chances are you live in a dorm with hundreds of other sexually active kids. If sealing the deal is ever jeopardized because of a lack of preparedness, canvass your floor. Chances are someone will be able to help you out. Or you can be like me and randomly stumble on someone in your dorm who has too many condoms and offers you a few extra, no questions asked. That works too.
5.) Win A Lifetime Supply!
How do you do this? It’s simple and fun: blow a condom balloon, do something clever with it, take a picture and send it to College Magazine. The winner will receive a lifetime* supply of Lifestyles condoms. In which case, ignore the rest of this list and enjoy your booty – both literally and figuratively! Of course, we can’t control how much use you’ll get out of them. That part is all up to you.
*Lifetime in CollegeMag world is 4 years…cause life ends after graduation right?
Photo: at http://yellowisthecolor.wordpress.com/2007/08/22/there-is-no-condom-for-the-heart/