How To Catch His Eye

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Human nature states that we all want what we can’t have. Coined by experts as “the string theory,” this fact is the essential idea behind all methods of seduction. Surprisingly, however, this theory has little to do with physics, and everything to do with kittens. Ever dangled a string in front of a playful kitten? The more you pull the string away, the more ferociously your fluffy friend will lunge for it. Now take that, and apply it to men.

Parker Vail is no advocate of playing games. There’s no need for mental warfare in a romantic situation. But I do advise this: don't give it away too soon, and don’t give it away for free.

When you first see a guy you think is interesting, make eye contact. It’s scary, and can sometimes feel unnatural; after all, it’s definitely a more aggressive move. But eye contact is easily one of the sexiest and most magnetic maneuvers you can utilize to catch his attention. The key is alternating between avoiding his eyes and staring too much. Look over and try to make eye contact every fifteen minutes or so. When you captivate his gaze, you captivate his mind, which makes a lasting impression. Next, it’s your chance to make a move.

So you’ve caught his eye; now you have two options. If you’re feeling bold, approach him directly. If you’re a little more reserved, make it more of a “lucky accident.” If you can summon the bravery to go up and talk to this guy, this is the moment to do it. It honestly doesn’t matter what you say; if you’ve gotten this far, a simple “Hi” will suffice. If there’s chemistry, wonderful! If not, cut your losses and move on. On the other hand, if you’re not necessarily the “first-move” kind of girl, find an excuse to move across the room and lightly brush his shoulder. Remember, it’s not a hockey game: we’re not shoulder-checking the target. But once you’re close to your boy, it’ll be hard for him to resist talking to you. This is your in!

Now that you’re chatting, it’s your time to seal the deal.The key to the real conversation here is to act like you could leave at any time. Not darting eye contact and frantic movements, but rather, act as though you’re an amazing, once-in-a-life-time opportunity. Let’s be honest: you are! Keep your first conversation brief, 10-15 minutes, tops. Make a simple excuse for why you should be going, something like “I have to meet my friends by the bar, they’re hopeless at navigating in crowded places.” Once you’ve given your reason, give him the chance to get your number. “This was fun, but when do we get round 2?” If you get the digits, great: he’s yours! If not, chalk it up to another missed connection. After all, not everyone is dating material. More fish in the sea, more stars in the sky, more grains of sand on an endless beach of beautiful men for you to find and dazzle.

If everything goes well, you now have his phone number. If you don’t hear from him in a day or two, feel out the situation– send him a short message, giving him a reason to hit you up. “Had a great night at X Club, but you were the highlight. Are you free this week?” Aim to do something during the daytime, especially if you met in a bar or club. If you’re trying to make an actual go of this thing, it’s important to make sure you two have some things in common, and no crowded dive is going to give you the opportunity to find outTexting is an easy habit to fall into, but try and keep communication between dates short; it’s a cop-out, and you exhaust potential conversation topics. Plus, the more elusive and simple your messages, the more curious he’ll be to find out more about you!

It’s not that hard to catch a man’s eye. What’s important is keeping his attention. These tips will hopefully land you the first date; after that, you’re on your own. Have fun, be yourself, and show him all that you have to offer in a relationship. Best of luck with your manhunting, ladies. And remember, Parker’s got your back.

Magazine Journalism > Syracuse University

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