With finals looming around the corner, social media sites are about to be inundated with struggling college students who can’t muster the strength or attention span to get their work done. As long as you follow our 10 Commandments of Procrastination, your (cough) study breaks will not get in the way of your ability to succeed.
1. You shall not watch more than one hour of TV at a time.
An hour of TV is a reasonable amount of time to rest your brain. More than an hour is a surefire way to get yourself hooked on a Friends marathon.
2. You shall at when you’re hungry.
If you tell yourself that you can’t take a break to eat just yet, you will likely spend the next hour distracted by your growling stomach, fantasizing about whatever you are craving. Plus, finals are a great excuse to order takeout.
3. You shall not whine about your workload via Facebook status, Tweet, or anything of the sort.
Everyone is in the same boat as you, and everyone is trying to get their minds off of finals. Please, stop reminding your friends what they should be doing.
4. You shall make time for face-to-face communication.
Convincing yourself that you don’t have time to grab coffee with a friend and in turn spending your day texting everyone you know from the library is a rookie move. Give yourself time for meaningful, in-person conversations that will leave you feeling refreshed, and then put your phone away.
5. You shall not sleep in the library.
Snoozing in the library is a perfect way to let everyone who can’t find a place to sit that you have no compassion whatsoever.
6. You shall set an alarm when you go home to nap.
You only have yourself to blame when “resting your eyes for 20 minutes” turns into a five-hour-long fiasco.
7. You shall not press “refresh” more than once.
When you have exhausted all of your social media feeds to the point where refreshing the page doesn’t yield any new posts, it is time to close the window and get back to work.
8. You shall not get carried away with the online shopping.
A combination of endless hours in front of the computer and the desire to partake in the holiday season can be dangerous for the impulsive online shopper. Pick a budget and stick to it.
9. You shall exit YouTube when enough is enough.
YouTube is a black hole of entertainment. When you realize that you have watched six Justin Beiber music videos, enough is enough.
10. You shall not throw a pity party when you are forced to pull an all-nighter.
Any distinguished procrastinator knows that he or she is at least partially to blame when things are left to the last minute. You may think your professors are conspiring to make your life miserable, but in reality, finals are a guaranteed hell week. It’s the nature of the beast, so pour yourself another cup of coffee and remember that in a few short days you will be home, watching Elf and forgetting every single thing from those godforsaken exams.