Am I a Tease?

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As girls, chances are we’ve all been in a situation where we just aren’t feeling it. You’re with a guy, he thinks it’s going well, but you know there’s no way in he** your panties are coming off. So at the end of the night, he goes home alone and you’re dubbed a tease.

It’s at times like these when us girls may ask ourselves if we’re sending out the wrong message. Are we bad people if we’re causing blue balls?

After a good deal of deliberation, I’ve come to understand that there is a difference between being a tease and being selective. For those who don’t believe me, let me break it down with a few scenarios:

Hanging Out Without Hooking Up: Guys and girls can’t be friends. You’ve heard it before, but it’s true. It’s only possible if the member of the opposite sex is the boyfriend/girlfriend of your best friend, if one is homosexual or if both parties are sadly unappealing. Otherwise there is always an attraction on at least one side and someone gets friend-zoned. If the guy is the one causing the longing, it is just assumed that he’s a “really good guy” who you can’t help falling in love with. If a girl is causing the longing she’s a tease. So is the solution for girls to just stop hanging out with guys? Should ladies just hang with other ladies and have pillow fights and braid each other’s hair all day? Yeah right.

Wearing a Hot Outfit When Her Boo Isn’t Around: A lot of guys think this is a major no no. Why on earth would a girl want to look good when her man isn’t around? Because she wants her milkshake to bring all the boys to the yard? Uh, no. Not gonna lie, there are times when I go all out with the intention of snagging a man, but more so than not girls get dressed to impress other girls. For the guys reading this, don’t lie, you know you don’t always notice what girls wear. A short skirt might catch your attention but if we only wanted to impress you we’d go out in bikinis every night. Dressing her best does not make a girl a tease.

Accepting a Date and Declining a Relationship: This is the big one, the one that really gets guys. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve heard, “I asked her out, PAID for her dinner and then she decided she didn’t like me. B*tch.” Well, her bad. Obviously she should have decided you were “the one” based on a random meeting at a frat house or after spending 50 minutes with you in class. Duh. Girls need a little time to get to know a guy before they decide if they like him. If after the date she wasn’t stunned by your personality she has every right to say no without being a tease.

 Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that girls don’t tease guys. If she’s flaunting her body in his face or suggestively touching with no intention of going any further, then yeah. I get it. But don’t blame a girl for being a girl and don’t call her a tease when she doesn’t deserve the title.

Senior > English and Communications > Boston College

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