Sex and Dating Blog: True Blood

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by Karen Turner


Eric is on the left and Bill is on the right.


Eric is on the left and Bill is on the right.
I know this kind of rant is usually reserved for message boards and obsessive fan forums and the like, but I feel like I must speak about this important issue.
Like many others, I’m completely obsessed with HBO’s True Blood, which, for anyone who’s been living under a rock, is essentially the very campy, very R-rated version of Twilight. And, like many others, I have strong opinions about the romantic life of heroine Sookie Stackhouse. Sookie’s a telepathic waitress who has vampires vying for her affection. But only two competitors really stand a chance: Bill, her first love, and Eric, an ancient, powerful vampire with a peculiar interest in Sookie. Bill is noble, gentlemanly, and very kind. Eric is selfish, cold, and, at an alarming 6’5", very huge and scary. To break it down, Bill: nice guy. Eric: Bad boy.





And who do all of my friends root for? Who’s clearly the fan favorite? Who stars in all the smutty fanfiction on the internet? Eric, of course. "If Eric and Sookie don’t get together next season, I’m seriously gonna kill the producers," said one of my friends, "and if they have sex, I don’t want it to be movie sex, like, I want to see peen in vaj." In my quest to find Eric/Sookie "shippers," I found tons of online material, including a web page run by someone who actually purchased the domain name "" Yet when I typed "Bill/Sookie" into my Google search bar, all I found was some crappy fanpop website and a bunch of links to Eric/Sookie sites and articles. Based on this scientific research, I can only conclude that there is, like, close to nobody out there who supports Bill.
Except for me. I am a Bill/Sookie shipper, a recent convert. I too used to swoon at the handsome Swede in leather (Eric), drawn to his confidence and borderline sadistic antics. And it was okay to like him, despite the fact that he terrorizes and eats people, because he’s a vampire. It’s in his nature to be bad. All the fangirls can openly admit to wanting the jerk because, well, he’s some otherworldly creature that doesn’t actually exist.
But then there’s a vampire like Bill on the show too–a nice guy who rejects his evil vampiric identity (sidenote: the word "vampiric" does not register as a spelling error in Word) and *shocker* doesn’t want to be a total asshole. He’s vegetarian, subsisting off of synthesized blood product, and is faithful to his human girlfriend Sookie. Bill truly loves her; meanwhile, Eric’s interest in her most likely stems from a selfish interest in her telepathic powers (i.e., he’s just not that into you). While Eric joyfully goes around killing people, Bill respects humanity. And while Eric scoffs at monogamy, Bill embraces it, at least as best as he can for a vampire. When it comes down to it, Bill is the one who actually mans up and tries to be a good person.
But he gets no respect, both on the show and among the fans, perfectly illustrating society’s obsession with cold-hearted assholes. Women love that shit. Men aspire towards it. And the guys who are trying to just be good, nice people get left in the dust.
Now that I’ve sufficiently embarrassed myself with geekiness, I think I’ll go now.
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