It’s important to keep relationships feeling new and exciting; this can be hard after you’ve been dating your significant other for a while. But that’s okay, because I’ve compiled a sweet list on how to keep the embers of your relationship burning with passion! Pick and choose – or try all 10! - to spice things up.
1. Make sex coupons
My boyfriend once told me that he’s never gotten a coupon for a “free” anything. That gave me the idea to make him some coupons that will get him more than just a free appetizer. I gathered my colorful construction paper, scissors, and glue, and got to work. In the end, I had a little makeshift book full of fun sex coupons. Free lap dance, free oral sex, free rub down, etc.. Have fun with your offers, and make them personal. And, of course, make them sexy, too!
2. Set the mood with candles and music
For those extra romantic nights, smooth jazz and candles are a must have. The candles provide the perfect glow – not too dim, not too bright – and the soft music provides a slow tempo to move your hips to. This may seem a bit cliché, but truthfully, it’s a practically foolproof way to a sexy atmosphere – “setting the mood always makes sexy-time better,” says Katherine Toro, junior at the University of Central Florida.
3. Role-play
“Map out interesting scenarios or pick real-life sexy couples to model yourselves after, then grab some fun costumes and let your imagination guide you,” suggests Vanessa Burton, Women’s Sexuality Correspondent for AskMen.com. Quiz your guy on his turn-ons and fantasies, and use them as inspiration.
4. Be a stripper for the night
“It’s no secret that most guys would love to see their significant other do a private sexy dance for them,” says Burton. “Throw on one of [your] favorite songs, and just go for it!”
5. Surprise your hubby by being naked under a trench coat
We’ve all seen this done before in the movies, so isn’t it about time we try it? It’s easy and definitely sexy – just throw on a pair of hot heels, throw on some sexy undergarments (this part is optional!) , and top the look with your favorite coat.
6. Buy sexy lingerie
“Lingerie is always fun [and it] spices things up in the bedroom,” says Toro. “He’ll enjoy the show at the very least.”
7. Use sex toys
“Sex toys are a fun and exciting way to put some heat back in the bedroom. You can take baby steps and begin with heated and flavored massage oils, then try some orgasm-enhancing lubricant, [and so on]. Regardless of how you do it, this bit of kink is sure to kick-start a heated sexual frenzy,” says Burton.
It’s important to use toys that you and your partner will both be comfortable with, so I suggest visiting the adult toyshop together.
8. Watch a sexy movie together
Key word here is “sexy.” Some couples may feel awkward or uncomfortable watching porn together; if you’re one of those shy cuties, then find a sex-centered Hollywood movie or soft-core porn video instead of the full-blown version.
9. Incorporate food in the bedroom
“Food play is a wonderful way to spice up your sex life. Stop by the grocery store, fill up your cart with all the foods you both love, and have fun!” suggests Kate McCarthy, Sexual Health Specialist at MIT. Whipped cream, chocolates, fruit, ice crème, you name it. Enjoy!
10. Have sex somewhere outside the bedroom
Even with hot sex, the bed can get boring after a while. But not to fear, there are tons of different places to "get it on" at! “Try new positions in different places, like the kitchen, bathroom, etc.” says Elizabeth Velazquez, junior at Northwestern University. The couch is typical location, but can feel new and exciting compared to the bed. How about the floor? If you have a sturdy table, I’d give that a shot as well.
There are a variety of different ways to keep your relationship fresh and spicy, but in the end, it really comes down to comfort. “Being comfortable in the relationship is extremely important. In the beginning of my relationship I was less willing to try things, but the longer we were together and the more comfortable I felt, the bedroom became spicier,” says Toro. “Don’t be afraid to try being aggressive sometimes,” adds Velazquez with a laugh.
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