By Anna Kowalczyk > University of Maryland/Photos By Jeff Kitson

Indiana University senior Jessica Ramos wakes up by 7 a.m. every morning and rushes through her day: balancing a high GPA, a job and an executive position for her sorority. She spends Saturday nights with her sorority sisters, but never lets herself sleep past 9 a.m. on weekends. Jessica might appear to be just an ambitious college student, but she has one large responsibility most students can hardly imagine: a “lively” two-year-old daughter, Anais.

“My pregnancy was semi-planned,” Ramos explained. “I was very much in love with my boyfriend, and we thought a baby would be a great idea for us, but I changed my mind and decided to wait until after I graduated. A month later I found out I was pregnant, so it was too late to wait.”

Young women in colleges across the country face the challenge of balancing school, social lives and parenting. With the passing of Title IX, many colleges now provide medical care and family housing, but pregnant and parenting students still face many emotional challenges in trying to lead the normal student’s life while fulfilling the responsibilities of a loving parent.

“It’s important to follow your dreams, and not let any unplanned circumstances get in your way,” Ramos said.

Ramos has worked to keep her ambitions high while caring for Anais. “As far as a future, I think [becoming pregnant] made me more determined,” Ramos said. “The semester I had my daughter I made the dean’s list for the first time, and I’ve had a 3.5 or higher each semester.” Ramos’ December graduation is very rare among pregnant teens.

“Pregnancy is the leading reason for high school drop-outs,” said CEO and President of the Healthy Teen Network, Patricia Paluzzi. “Many pregnant or parenting girls do not reach college.”

Much of this may be due to the lack of support for pregnant students. “The pregnant girl is very vilified,” said Paluzzi. “She is the ‘bad girl.’ The girl receives full blame while the guy is let off the hook.’”

Brittni Bunce, a sophomore at Brigham Young University, is 32 weeks pregnant. Originally, Brittni and her boyfriend had planned on waiting to have a child until after graduation when they would be financially ready. Brigham Young provides substantial support for young families, with professors who allow students to bring children to class, breastfeeding couches in all bathrooms and a myriad of family housing.

Brittni feels society is far less understanding. “Most people in my community assumed I was going to quit school and that all my hard effort to get into such a well-respected college would go to waste,” Bunce said. “Society has made it seem like if you are a young mother, you have ruined your life.”

While there are some small support groups around the country, there is no national support group to help pregnant students. Ramos started a Facebook Group “I’m pregnant and in college what is a girl to do!” because she felt there was no support available. “I felt like I was the only pregnant person in college, and it’s hard when you’re by yourself, and no one can identify with your situation,” she said.

“No one other than my friends acknowledged my pregnancy, and I stayed in school until the day I went to the hospital,” Ramos said. “I constantly have to find babysitters. If I can’t, groups give me the most work, which I feel is unfair, but what can you do?”

Miryam Chico, a May journalism graduate and one of Ramos’ sorority sisters, lived with Ramos during and after her pregnancy and saw how other students and society treated her roommate. “We mostly hung out with the Latino crowd at IU,” explained Chico.

Ramos says her friends helped her raise Anais and enjoy her college experience.

“It was truly one of the best experiences ever,” Chico said. “I was able to see how her belly grew and feel the baby kick. Those months were all about being a support system for her and the baby.”

When Ramos returned to school after the birth, Chico “wanted to play with the baby all the time.” Though this was distracting at first, she soon learned how to balance her studies with her home life.

“We became like a little family...I would help Jessica as much as I could, babysitting occasionally and just helping out [with] whatever she may need,” Chico said. “Sometimes, I would just sit in amazement at how much Jessica was able to handle. Of course, she’d have her meltdowns from time to time, but never once did she complain or quit.”

Though raising Anais on a college campus was difficult, Ramos thinks her daughter benefited from the experience. “It has made her a social butterfly,” explained Ramos. “She was exposed to art and music as an infant so she loves to dance, sing and paint…I feel like she had opportunities here that she wouldn’t have been exposed to had I still lived at home with my family.”

While both Ramos and Bunce face great challenges, they see them as ammunition for success. Although they do not recommend becoming pregnant during college, neither woman sees parenting as a reason to quit college.

“[Young mothers] have made choices to start a family sooner than most, but [their] life definitely isn’t over or ruined, it is just changed,” Bunce said. “Instead of thinking about weekend parties, my mind shifts to thinking about what color of bumper I am going to put in the baby’s crib.”

“It is important for you to be happy and provide the best possible life that you can for your child and yourself,” said Ramos. “Stay in college, study what you want, and do everything you said you were going to do. Will it be rough? Absolutely. But it’s worth it.”