By Kate

This is the second in a series of monthly interviews with women who are wildly happy with their sex lives.

Age: 23. Interested in: men and women. Relationship status: married (to a man).

Q: Why do you consider yourself a satisfied woman?

Nothing is missing from my sex life. I’m fulfilled emotionally, physically, and creatively. Past relationships were off balance: [they were] sexually explosive but emotional wrecks; or [we connected] in amazing ways during conversation but [had] completely different wants and needs in the bedroom.

Q: Any tricks or techniques you find particularly awesome?

Not having sex – or at least not the penis-in-vagina definition. I enjoy lots of other things too, and if I don’t listen to those desires, I don’t enjoy sex as much, in general. It also takes some pressure off - I hate feeling like making-out has to lead to intercourse every time.

With my choice of birth control, Fertility Awareness Method / FAM, we abstain from [intercourse] altogether every month around ovulation. It’s a courtship/honeymoon dichotomy every month. [We have space to] try new things.

Q: Any advice for less-than-satisfied women?

Don’t be ashamed to admit what really turns you on. Sometimes we pigeonhole ourselves to maintain an image, but sex will be better if you explore everything you want. Don’t assume that the nice guy will think you’re a freak if you want to tie him down.

Q: How about for their partners?

Take your time. Try not to make [bringing her to] climax your ultimate goal. Pay attention to her whole body, or over-stimulation could kill what would have been great sex.

Make each other feel sexy. Affection and compliments go a long way. So does the occasional ass-grab and passionate, spontaneous kiss. I want someone to want me all the time, not just before sex.

Paid Tip of the Week

By Lisa

Get more bang-for-your-buck at the grocery store! Lean in for the fine print and check out the unit cost. It breaks down the cost per unit of measure – i.e., ounce, quart, gallon – and helps you decide between the six-pack of Natty Light and the forty of Milwaukee’s Best.

16.7% of 15- to 19-year-old and 31.8% of 20- to 24-year-old women currently use the Pill.

By Kate

That is the dilemma of a friend who just started seeing someone new.  The Pill drags on her libido, but she tends to date boys who hate condoms, and it’s nice to have the extra reassurance.

Of course her beaus hate condoms.  Among other shortcomings, they just don’t feel as good.  If you are allergic to latex, they will even set your crotch on fire.  So I fathom the allure of the Pill (and appreciate the part it’s played in fostering the sexual freedom of women.)

But I thought that condoms were standard, growing up as we did post-AIDS.  Wrong.  In 2002, the CDC found that the Pill is the most popular contraceptive method among women ages 15 to 24—roughly twice as popular as condoms.

The same year as that study, I tried the Pill.  The hormones body slammed me.  I gained weight and turned moody—if I felt anything, because mostly I drew an emotional blank.  Bigger boobs and condom-free sex did not compensate for the depression, the only common side effect rarely alleviated by switching prescriptions.  When I went off it, not being a cranky robot anymore more than made up for switching back to condoms.

Not that it makes every woman a zombie, especially with all the low-dose formulas available now.  If you are thinking about going on the Pill, here are some important lessons I learned the hard way:

• Go into the GYN’s prepared with a list of questions and concerns, and stick to it.
• Tell the truth about your sex life: The doctor can’t help with what the doctor doesn’t know about.
• If you start taking birth control, ask yourself how you feel-physically and emotionally.
• If the answer is “crappy,” then fix it. Working together, you and your doctor may be able to find a formula better suited to you.
• Above all, do not feel guilty about stopping. You are the only inhabitant of your body. Don’t worry about what your boyfriend wants: If he has to choose between condoms or no sex at all, he will always choose condoms.

Paid Tip of the Week

By Lisa

Looking for a little extra security as a renter?  A good safeguard is renters insurance. Depending on the coverage, a policy will run you about $150 to $300 a year and protect your belongs against destruction and theft-and you, if your apartment becomes unlivable.

Image Source: http://www.eontarionow.com/health/2007/10/19/maine-middle-school-gives-girls-birth-control-pills/